


'Teach me to play?'

by Drhair76



Series: You don't have to say I love you to say I love you [3]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Emily is a good friend, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Gen, Her sister could play too, Implied Slash, JJ can play the piano, they are the cutest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-30
Updated: 2019-01-30
Packaged: 2019-10-19 10:44:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17599820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Drhair76/pseuds/Drhair76
Summary: Jennifer woke up with a soft and mushy feeling inside.There was this pressure on her lungs and all she could do was sigh.Today was one of those days.Or, JJ feels her sister's death a little more than usual today.





	'Teach me to play?'

**Author's Note:**

> This is a Highschool AU that I'm probably going to be expanding on, so I'm excited for that. 
> 
> Also I don't know if JJ's sister's name is Rozlyn or Roslyn so I just picked Roslyn.

JJ's sister was the one who taught her the piano. Roslyn had taught herself one week when she didn't have soccer and soon their quiet home was filled with beautiful melodies. 

Roslyn was always so graceful whenever she moved or danced and it came to the surprise of no one that her piano playing was too. JJ loved watching her beautiful thin finger racing across the keys and while she never felt like a person who would do anything in music, she suddenly had the urge to play like her. 

She kept that urge quiet until Roslyn learned Canon in D major. The song brought JJ to tears and she couldn't help but ask. 

"Teach me to play?" She asked softly, wiping some tears from her cheeks.

 Roslyn smiled that kind smile and gently guided JJ's hands to the keys. 

Ros was patient with her, the way she's always been. In whatever they did, JJ was always a couple paces behind, always wanting to be just like her sister. Unlike other siblings, Roslyn never got angry with her for 'copying' or anything like that, she always seemed flattered.

Eventually, with three weeks of daily practice JJ's fingers were hitting the notes of Happy Birthday steadily. She played it for her sister and relished in her delighted laugh and clap when she finished. 

"That was amazing Jen!" Roslyn beamed. "What do you want to learn next?" 

And that was the year before Ros...died. 

Suddenly there was no more beautiful melodies trickling throughout the house, no more patient, gentle smiles, no more graceful piano playing. 

Jennifer woke up with a soft and mushy feeling inside. It felt like her organs had been replaced with marshmallow fluff. Absently, JJ realized that sounded like something Penelope would say. 

There was this pressure on her lungs and all she could do was sigh.

  Today was one of  _those_  days. 

Today was one of those days when she felt her sister's absence like a weight on her chest. Today was once of those days where not even Spencer's oblivious nature could bring a smile to her face. Today was one of those days where no matter what, Jennifer felt as if she couldn't escape the cloud of black hanging around her head. 

She went to school, because no matter how sad she was, the only excuse her english teacher would accept was if she was in the hospital or dead. JJ wasn't in the mood to see Em today. Faking a smile in front of her would hurt too much. 

"Hey JJ." Emily greeted, with a large smile that on any normal day would set the butterflies in her stomach off. "Ready for hell?" 

Jen just shrugged and sat down in her seat. She didn't feel up for much talking today, she didn't think she could without crying. JJ could feel Emily's eyes on her as she reached for her book and last classes homework. 

Emily placed a hand on JJ's shoulder, effectively grabbing the shorter girl's attention.  "Do you want to talk about it or do you want me to just be here?" 

Jennifer looked up at her friend and blinked back tears that she didn't even know were there. 

"Be here please?" 

The hand on JJ's shoulder dropped to her own hand that was sitting on the desk for a brief second. 

"Always." 

Later found Jennifer sitting at the piano plunking at the keys slowly. The piano was only bought for Roslyn because her mom believed that it made her happy. And it seemed that it did. 

But that didn't ring true. 

Her stomach rolled and she felt the lump in her throat grow. Her fingers started to move faster and faster and she forgot her pain for a moment in the familiar movements. 

After Ros died, she didn't pick up the piano for a couple of months. The memories were too fresh, too painful for Jennifer to even look at the instrument. But even though it was painful, she knew that Roslyn wouldn't want to her to stop doing something she loved just because she wasn't there anymore. So she continued. She got lessons, apparently Spencer was proficient and offered to teach her for free. Her playing got better and her heart healed.  But there were still days like this. 

There would always be days like this.

 She heard the door open over her playing but she didn't stop. The music was swelling and stopping now would make her feel incomplete. After a moment Emily stepped over to stand next to the piano. She watched while JJ played. Jen didn't stop playing, when the song was finished Emily smiled. 

"That was amazing." JJ shrugged and patted the space next to her. Emily sat obediently and there was a comfortable silence.

  "Teach me to play?" She asked softly and JJ jolted. 

The words were an exact copy from two years ago and it made something inside Jen shake. She didn't speak, hoping that Emily knew her well enough that to follow her lead. She played a simple melody slowly and stopped and Emily copied her after she was done. They went back and forth twice before JJ's eyes misted over. 

She wanted to teach Emily. Ros would've been able to. Ros should be here to teach Emily the way she deserved. 

She tried again and accidentally played a note off key. The sour note made Emily's focus reroute from the keys to JJ's face.

She was bent downward and tears were rolling down her cheeks. Her hand flew up to her face to cover her mouth--to cover her cries and Emily felt a weird sense of relief. 

She couldn't help if Jen didn't want her too but now she could. She pulled the blonde girl in and curled her arms around her.

  "She's gone." Jen sobbed. "Th-this is all I have left." JJ curled a hand into the fabric of Emily's shirt and all she could do was rub her back slowly.  

 "No, you have us." She said firmly. "And you have this. You have all the memories you two made together and no matter what you need to know that she's proud of you. If she were here she'd be so proud of you. I know I am." 

Emily held Jennifer as she shook. And she kept holding her until she stopped. The two girls sat at the piano, arms still wrapped around each other. 

"Thank you Em." Jennifer whispered into the taller girl's shoulder. Emily pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

"Anytime."   


End file.
